[感想]真實的謊言

| | 迴響 (19) | 引用 (0)


像被扒光衣服似的,我的一切都坦然了…


朋友要結婚了,一個曾經說過愛我的人。
心情很複雜,非常複雜。

因緣際會得知了原來她跟我家裡人的關係很好,一直都很好。
換句話說,我說出口的一切,都有人幫我佐證,不管是對是錯。

我才知道,原來她只是不想揭穿我。

我又羞又怒。
像個做錯事的小學生,不願面對,卻又渴求被原諒。

一個謊,兩個謊,三個謊,然後像在滾雪球一樣,不得不說更大的謊來圓。
我的人生,到目前為止,在別人面前表現出來的,有很多是假像。

該停止了,這一切的虛偽。


不止是謊言,承諾也終於要面臨永久無法兌現的事實了。

「決定要愛你,如此強烈而特殊,日夜重覆,因為我愛你」
那是我第一次唱情歌給女生聽,輔大的校園燈光把夜晚點綴的好不美麗。

「去阿里山看日出吧!」
這麼多年過去,約定依舊只是約定。


黃大煒唱的對,「寂寞是被原諒的罪」,我真的很容易感到寂寞。

有人對自己好的時候,沒有珍惜,對別人的好,就要被糟踏。
我懷疑自己根本就沒愛過她。

不,我根本就不懂怎麼愛人。

甚少為感情流淚,朋友永遠優先女友,這算什麼?

白走這一遭了。


「要幸福哦!」

我討厭聽到那兩個字。
曾拒絕我的人只會用它來搪塞我,假關心。

但這次真的要祝她幸福了。


典禮上應該是這輩子最後一次見面了,就像另外一個永遠不想再見到面的人一樣。
都結束了,活到現在,最重要的兩個女人。

還有謊言。


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引用 [感想]真實的謊言 的文章如下 :

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elisa0217 說:

都說知道啊
你說ㄉ你自己都知道啊
但是
又有幾個人真的做的到
你說應該停止虛偽了
可是......真的可以嗎?
ㄟ 部是在責備你啦
只是想說
很多時候每個人都清楚自己犯ㄌ什麼錯
但是真的能面對的人卻沒幾個
勇氣這種東西
不是嘴巴說說就會有的

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